Intimate life of the newlyweds. What should newlyweds do on their wedding night? Wedding night in a communal apartment
A few tips for newlyweds on their wedding night
If you marry a virgin, then some
advice from gynecologists and sexologists about the culture of the wedding night.
The first wedding night is very important for the awakening of a woman's sensuality.
If the husband does not show tact, tenderness and understanding of the uncertainty and fear of his
young wife, then she may develop an aversion to sexual intercourse for the rest of her life.
act.
But girls should also know that the wrong behavior of a husband can
be caused not by his tactlessness, but by inexperience, embarrassment, excitement.
Maybe he had earlier sexual contacts, but they took place in
unsuitable conditions, when desire has so taken possession of him that sexual intercourse
happened where the desire overtook him. And on the wedding night
must be done "for real", in bed, and he is very afraid of being
not up to par. In addition, a young husband may not know much about the culture.
sex.
It can also be a hindrance that the first wedding night usually takes place
after the wedding, when, according to the customs of our country, everyone drinks and eats a lot. If a
the young husband did not lag behind other guests in drinking and eating, then he may
have erection problems, and if he drank too much, then how many
drunk men, he can be rude and unceremonious.
The best thing for both newlyweds is to drink a glass of champagne, which
will relieve nervous tension, reduce the modesty of the newlywed and insecurity
newlywed, and also improve sexual sensitivity, but no more.
Some wines, and especially spirits, have a negative effect on
sexual feeling, reduce the sensitivity of a man, so sexual intercourse
can last too long, and when, after defloration, the newlywed
experienced pain, then prolonged sexual intercourse will give her a lot of discomfort,
and for the rest of her life she can remember her unpleasant impressions and desire,
so that the relationship ends as soon as possible.
Therefore, it is best for a girl not to tune in to the fact that the first in her
life, sexual intercourse will be the height of bliss and merging in ecstasy with your beloved
man.
During the first sexual intercourse, almost no girl experiences
enjoyment. Most often, this is unpleasant for her if she is not yet morally
ready for defloration.
Defloration will be a little painful, but quite tolerable. Not
tune in to the fact that you will experience unbearable suffering,
otherwise, from fear, you may experience such a disorder as vaginismus -
spasmodic contraction of the muscles of the vagina, due to which you cannot
to live a sexual life not only on the wedding night, but also in the future.
Some virgins almost do not feel defloration.
After the first intercourse, a woman may remain undeflorated.
The reason for this may be too much extensibility of the hymen,
or vice versa, its strength is too great, "break through" which in one night
husband cannot. An extensible hymen may persist even until childbirth,
although the woman is regularly sexually active. And a strong hymen
sometimes you have to notch, and only then the man performs defloration.
Mandatory conditions for the first sexual intercourse, according to
M.Kinessa, is the mutual consent of the partners, the application
birth control (for example, a condom lubricated with petroleum jelly),
bed and complete privacy. The time of day doesn't matter. Although it is considered
that night is the best time for the first sexual intercourse, since a woman in
men are less shy in the dark, but during the day spouses are more active, sexual
the act will proceed under the control of vision, which will allow less injury
woman. And a girl, becoming a woman, can simply close her eyes, which is
do most women even during kissing.
The use of a condom during the first sexual intercourse, according to
M.Kinnessa, a gynecologist and sexologist with 50 years of experience, of course.
Firstly, it will protect a woman from an unwanted pregnancy.
There are many cases when women become pregnant after the first sexual intercourse.
Secondly, if the husband was sexually active with different partners before marriage,
then it is possible that he has venereal diseases, about which he himself
may not suspect.
Thirdly, the use of a condom will prevent falling into tears
hymen of various infections. The girl's vagina before the onset of sexual intercourse
life, while observing personal hygiene, has the highest degree of cleanliness, it
bacteria have not yet entered. Not all men know that before sexual
intercourse, you need to thoroughly wash your genitals with soap, and even more so,
before the defloration of a virgin. As a result, a man can enter into
female genitals various infection. Particularly sensitive to
infections torn hymen. In addition, if a man does not comply
personal hygiene in the area of the glans penis, under the foreskin,
accumulation of urine and semen residues, which are carcinogenic
action, and can cause cancer of the female genital organs. Therefore the condom
not only obligatory for sexual intercourse with a virgin, but desirable
lubricate it with boron petroleum jelly, which has a gentle disinfectant
action and destroy bacteria.
Although during the first sexual intercourse, the girl probably will not experience any
pleasant sensations, but, nevertheless, a man must caress her. Firstly,
he teaches her to caress, and secondly, if he uses erotic caresses,
and she will have an orgasm when stimulating the clitoris, then it will be easier for her to endure
defloration.
Gynecologists recommend defloration only in the position
women "lying on their backs".
At the second, third and subsequent sexual intercourse, the appearance of pleasant
and even voluptuous sensations are already quite possible if the psyche of a woman is not
traumatized by the tactlessness or rudeness of her husband.
Of great importance for the appearance of a woman's sexual feeling is
experience of the husband and his skill and knowledge of the whole range of erotic caresses.
If your husband is gentle and affectionate, then this is wonderful, and it would be nice,
so that it remains the same throughout your married life. But if
he will not show extraordinary caresses, then show indulgence and forgive
him for the first time. But only for the first. Subsequently, when you
get used to each other and stop being shy, then you need to gradually
accustom your husband to caresses so that they become an integral part of your intimate
life and took at least half an hour, and preferably more. The more tender and
the longer you will caress each other during your honeymoon, the
more likely that you will not remain sexually unsatisfied, and you
husband will be sexual harmony.
Understand the most important thing - sexual harmony is not given to spouses by someone
over. This is the result of their joint activities, it happens that even by the method
"trial and error", attention, patience and mutual tenderness. But everything is necessary
should be mutual. If you do not caress your husband, but will
lie "like a log", only passively perceiving his caresses, then even the most
a patient and loving husband may very soon be disappointed in you. The more
you will reciprocate your husband's caresses, the more active it will become
your spouse, wanting to give you maximum pleasure.
After a woman starting her sex life experiences
orgasm, her sexuality is booming. Attachment to a husband who
gives her the opportunity to experience such pleasure, can become very strong.
Sexual harmony brings spouses very close and helps them overcome
many disagreements in their life together and find compromises.
If the husband is drunk, then you will definitely be disappointed with his behavior. To
this, too, should be treated with indulgence, unless your spouse
drinker, and this is an isolated case. For a drinker, it’s better not at all
get married, especially at a young age. Most likely you are not
cope with your husband, and after the wedding he will drink even more.
If you have been sexually active for a long time, then still do not lose
head and after the wedding, do not forget about contraceptives.
It is known that many marriages are registered in the presence of pregnancy
brides, especially minors. Or the newlyweds are not protected
from pregnancy during the honeymoon, and after 9 months they
become parents.
M.Kinessa writes: "You should never strive to quickly give birth to a child.
This will immediately turn you into a slave, tie you hand and foot, and not only
physically. In case of a life mistake (and you can always make a mistake), a woman
will also be bound by a moral duty - to save the family in the name of the child. And
this is the worst. Personally, I advise women not to wait for change - how
as a rule, they do not come, no matter how the husband swears to change his behavior.
I think that all newlyweds should heed the advice of such an experienced
gynecologist and sexologist.
Let's see what happens most often in young families. A woman won't make it
get married, as soon as she becomes pregnant. Toxicosis begins with nausea,
perversion of taste, irritability. Conflicts begin with her husband because of
the fact that she is sick all the time, she feels bad, everything is disgusting, including intimate
life, and the husband himself. Then childbirth, after which a woman may become ugly or
she will have some complications. Then breastfeeding,
sleepless nights, a lot of worries and troubles, and again no time for sex and no time for a husband.
The wife is still young, she wants to take a walk and have fun, but she cannot,
because she has a baby. This may not affect the husband much, he
the child does not need to be breastfed, he can afford to have fun, including
number and change his wife.
Young wives, know that the first betrayal very often happens at a time when
when the wife lies in the hospital and in agony gives birth to a child. And it happens during
wife's pregnancy. A little squeaky lump that needs to be given
a lot of attention, does not yet awaken in the newly-made dad strong paternal
feelings, especially if dad himself is still immature and infantile. Having a child
does not stabilize your marriage, but may complicate your relationship if your spouse
your not very ready for the role of a father. It also affects the frequency
sexual contacts of spouses. When a child is naughty and cries nearby,
when a young mother is overworked and constantly does not get enough sleep, she is not at all up to
sex. This affects her sexuality as well. A woman may have
several children, and she will never experience sexual pleasure.
Therefore, those men who are sexual egoists do not
take care of the health of their wife, do not take care of her and do not protect themselves in order to
do not deprive yourself of full sensations, and thereby doom her to
childbearing or abortions are not very suitable for the role of a husband. It is very important
for marriage.
According to M. Kinessa, a real man will never allow, firstly,
leave a woman unsatisfied with intimate relationships, secondly,
to have at least one abortion that takes away so much women's health. That's why
she recommends that women never rush to have children and have them
only after making sure of the full health of your family and confidence in the strength
marriage. Very wise advice.
If you have carefully read all the previous chapters addressed to
mostly married women, and take into account all the recommendations, then this
will help you avoid many mistakes from the very beginning of your marriage.
Preparing for a wedding is the most exciting event for a girl. There are so many things to choose, think over and prepare that your head is spinning. Restaurant, dress, hairstyle, bouquet, guests - all this occupies your thoughts from morning to evening. You, for sure, have already flipped through dozens of thematic magazines and studied no less Internet sites, but have you lost sight of another important moment of the upcoming event? How about the first wedding night? Are you ready to make it special and unforgettable, as it should be for newlyweds? We hope our tips will help you with this.
What to do on your wedding night
Decide where exactly the merge of your loving souls and bodies will take place. Perhaps it will be a chic honeymoon suite in a hotel where the staff will take care of everything, or perhaps after the celebration you will return to your own apartment, where there should be an appropriate atmosphere that needs to be thought out. Turn your bedroom into a love nest, where there will be no place for bad moods or strangers. This night should be just for the two of you, so everything is in your hands.
· It is clear that both newly-made spouses can't wait to unpack the gifts and count the money donated for the wedding, but this activity is definitely not for the wedding night. Do not spoil the romantic mood with materialistic moments. Save your zeal for sexual pleasures and enjoyment of each other, and not gifts from relatives and friends.
· You can create a romantic atmosphere without the notorious rose petals and candles. Of course, if it pleases you, then decorate your bedroom as you like, but first of all, take care of the sexy underwear in which your husband will see you on this special night.
· An equally important item in planning the first wedding night should be the menu. At your discretion, choose drinks, cool them in advance. And as snacks, it is better to prefer seafood, because they are the best aphrodisiacs.
· You can relax after a busy day and relieve stress by taking a bath together. Candles, music, foam and aromatic oils are up to you.
· The first wedding night is the best time to remove the old prohibitions in sex and experiment with images and roles. Show your imagination, try on various erotic images and think over the scenario of an intimate game. This will make your sex especially memorable.
We live in the modern age, when the first wedding night of newlyweds is almost always a convention. Many young people even before the wedding enter into an intimate relationship or even manage to live together for a while. But this is not a reason to neglect the special moment that symbolizes the transition to a new level of your relationship. Approach this with all responsibility and enthusiasm and discover the joy of sexual intimacy for yourself in a new way.
An Englishwoman married a Frenchman. On the wedding night, the husband comes naked to his young wife. She wraps herself in a blanket and says:
- And it is customary for us on the wedding night to go into the room to his wife in a tailcoat.
- And it is customary for us to go in tailcoats only to premieres!
Hello, are you married? Well, what do you say for the wedding night?
- Ta! Changed my last name on social media all night...
Nowadays, the wedding night now looks like this: a girl sits all night at the computer and changes her last name in profiles ...
The wedding night.
The husband strokes his wife's belly and says:
- This is my field, here I will plant potatoes, - and fell asleep.
On the second night, he strokes his back and says:
- Here I will plant cabbage, - and fell asleep.
On the third night, his wife says to him:
- Hey, farmer, if you don’t plant carrots tonight, then I’ll rent the field!
What is the first wedding night compared to the first extramarital!
You, they say, married the director's daughter.
- Yes.
- So how is it?
- On the wedding night, I had to do 10 takes.
On the wedding night, the young people in bed corresponded for a long time on the phone and fell asleep tired and happy.
The most common phrase on the wedding night:
- Only 500 rubles?! They also call friends!
The wedding night.
- Honey, - the newlywed confesses, - I want to be honest: you are not my first ....
- I want to be honest too: I don't believe you!
If on the wedding night the young wife was not a virgin, then
according to the law of the mountains, it is she who is hung on the fence instead of a sheet.
What should a newly minted, modern young married couple do on their wedding night so as not to stain the sheet?
- Wash your feet.
So how was your wedding night?
- So-so. Simply outraged. The bride turned out to be quite inexperienced!
I found out on my wedding night that my wife was a virgin. The only embarrassing thing is that this is her second marriage!
Newlyweds…
The wedding night…
The husband takes the bride, fills a full bath and drowns her ... And no sex!!! So four nights...
A frightened wife calls her mother ...
- Mom what is it! I can’t have sex with my husband for the fourth night ... Everything is gaining a full bath and drowning me ...
Mother of the bride...
- Be patient, daughter, he is a tire fitter, he is probably looking for a hole !!!
The wedding night. Shoemaker:
- You do not press?
Doctor:
- Are you hurt?
Watchmaker:
- Did you pick it yourself, or did you give it to someone?
A man comes to work after his wedding. Colleagues:
- Well, how was the first wedding night?
- I do not remember! I lost consciousness after she peeled off my eyelashes ...
A seventy-year-old count married a young fashion model. The wedding night. Young people in bed. The old man takes his hand out from under the blanket and shows his wife three fingers. The model exclaims in anticipation:
- What only three times?!
- No, choose which one!
The wedding night. The groom leads the bride into the bedroom.
- You know, dear, it's good that you didn't give yourself up.
me before the wedding. I must confess otherwise I would
I guess he didn't marry you.
- Didn't I know? How many men have already thrown me like that.
until I figured out what it was.
An old man married a young girl. The first wedding night has come. They are sitting on the bed. Husband asks:
- What do you need to do, you know?
Wife:
- Nope...
"And your mother didn't explain?"
- Nope...
- And girlfriends did not share?
- Nope...
- Didn't you see it on TV?
- Nope...
- Oh, that's what I forgot!
An elderly teacher married a young student and on their wedding night asks:
- Lenochka, did you have boys?
- Not.
- Lenochka, didn't your mother tell you anything?
- Not.
- What about girlfriends?
- Not.
- Have you read anything in books?
- Not.
- That's the trouble, and I forgot everything,
The wedding night. It turns out that the young has already lost innocence. The husband sits sad, and then asks:
- And what, you didn’t want to marry a girl at all?
“Of course I would, dear. I already tried, tried, but at the age of eleven they don’t register.
The wedding night ... Only the young went to bed, the persistent ringing at the door.
The groom, swearing, goes into the hallway and opens the door.
Two men with a coffin on their shoulders enter the apartment without a word, go around the marital bed and - to the exit. Groom:
- Not understood!! What the hell?
- Sorry, bro! Do not turn around in the entrance!!
I imagine a modern wedding night like this: a woman sits and convulsively changes her last name in profiles.
Once, an 80-year-old grandfather decided to marry a 75-year-old grandmother. And took.
The wedding night. Two "young" in bed. Grandfather takes the woman by the hand and falls asleep.
This goes on throughout the honeymoon.
After the aforementioned month, the grandfather again tries to grab hold of the grandmother's hand, and she pulls it out with the words:
- I don't want to today. My head hurts.
My wife asked me to help her change the sheets.
Refueling. Wife:
- Do you recognize this linen?
- No, - I answer, - should I?
- This is the linen on which we slept on our wedding night!
- Yes? I do not remember...
I turn the duvet cover in all directions, trying to figure out how to stuff the blanket into it, I shout in my hearts:
- Damn, where's the hole?!
Wife, unperturbed:
- That's it ... You ask the same questions ...
The old lord married a young wife. On his wedding night, he fails. And he asks the butler to hold the candlestick. Still nothing works. Then he asks the butler to take his place, while he himself holds the candlestick. Everything works out for the butler, the young wife is in ecstasy.
The old lord says to the butler:
- That's what it means to hold a candlestick correctly, Barrymore ...
Naturally, we slept on the first night. This is always the case in serious relationships.
Honey, do you remember our first night?
- Do you think I can forget this horror?
The newlyweds say:
- The wedding night was - WOW!
The whole apartment was shaking.
- And who was the first to say: "Enough, I can't take it anymore!"?
- Neighbor...
The newlyweds say:
- Wedding night was - swing! The whole apartment was shaking!
- And who was the first to say: "Enough, I can't take it anymore!"?
- Neighbor behind the wall ...
The couple decided to celebrate their 50th wedding anniversary in the same setting as on their wedding night.
Dress exactly like this. We rented the same room at the hotel. They put on the same music. And as then, the husband went to pee. From the toilet room came his laughter.
- How romantic, dear! wife remarked. - Everything is the same: the atmosphere, the music... And fifty years ago you also laughed in the toilet!
- Yes honey. Only then I laughed because I splashed the ceiling, and now because I poured water on my feet ...
Want to spend tonight in bed with a few crumbs? Then eat croutons at night.
We spent a sleepless night together - me and a mosquito. He drank and sang all night, and I applauded him.
Russian Railways offers me discounts on reserved seats on New Year's Eve. And
so far this is the best New Year's Eve offer.
The clients and staff of the resort hotel are on their ears after the news that a couple is arriving there for their honeymoon - a 95-year-old groom and a 22-year-old bride.
When they arrived, the old man was such a pitiful sight that everyone began to fear that the wedding night would kill him. However, the next morning the bride slowly left the room and, convulsively clinging to the railing, went down to the first floor. The receptionist, seeing her like this, asked what had happened.
The lady replied:
- He said that he had been saving for 75 years. I thought it was about money...
There were two twin brothers.
One was still a virgin, and the other was walking
right and left. And so they decided to get married on the same day.
During the wedding, the reveler brother decided to play a joke on
brother-virgins and challenged him to a competition - who is the first
If he throws more sticks on his wedding night, he won.
He agreed. And so the tempted brother throws the first stick.
He puts a wand on the wall, then throws a second and puts another
dash, hardly throws the third stick, puts a mark on the wall
and falls asleep in exhaustion. In the morning his brother wakes him up and asks
how much do you have. He hardly points to the wall.
He sees three dashes there (III) and sighs:
- One hundred eleven. You won. You have four more.
Remember, as a child, when you stayed at a party for the night, on the second night you feel like a stranger and want to go to your mommy? So, the same garbage is married.
I'm sorry, - the secretary interrupts him, - I didn't hear. On the night of the twentieth to what?
Landed somehow outside the city a couple of aliens - a husband and wife.
We got acquainted with our collective farmers - Vanya and Manya. On the night before departure, they decided to exchange partners - firstly, it's interesting, and secondly, no one will know.
Well, Masha lay down with theirs. She looks under the covers.
- So Littel?!!
He - just a minute - Twisted his right ear.
She (looking under the covers): Wow! But very thin.
He: Wait a minute - Twisted his left ear.
Her: Wow!!!
And they got it.
The night has passed. The next morning the aliens flew away. Vasya and Manya are sitting and sharing their impressions.
Manya: Such a night, such a night. I will never forget her.
Vasya: And this one, instead of sex, twisted my ears all night.
Why did you get kicked out of the weather station?
- So, we hung around with the radio operator all night, didn’t get in touch.
- And they kicked you out for it?
- So after all, the night is polar
Daughter, where have you been wandering all night?!
- Dad, three guys guarded me in the entrance and raped me!
- It's a five-minute deal! Where have you been all night?!
The finale of any wedding celebration is the wedding night. Nowadays, the first night of the newlyweds has become a convention that has no value. Now it is considered the norm when newlyweds have sex far before the wedding.
But once the wedding night was accompanied by a whole ritual, different for every nation. We offer a look at the pages of history and remember the customs of the wedding night.
HOW WAS THE FIRST WEDDING NIGHT IN EUROPE
In the Middle Ages, there was a tradition in European countries according to which the bride had to spend the night not with her husband, but with the feudal lord. Historians give different arguments about the emergence of such a custom. Some argued that the deprivation of virginity is a dangerous procedure, subject only to deities, and the feudal lord took full responsibility for what was happening and protected the spouses from the wrath of the gods.
Others complained about the satisfaction of their sexual needs and the desire to be above everyone else, because the feudal lord could easily refuse ugly brides, and this rule was always followed with beautiful girls. True, at the end of the 16th century, such a custom was abandoned in Switzerland, and in Germany it was replaced with a ransom.
SEX ON THE FIRST WEDDING NIGHT IN AFRICA
In some tribes of Africa, on the wedding night, it was customary to knock out the girl's two front teeth. It symbolized marriage - something like a wedding ring. Married women were not ashamed of their toothless smile and showed it to everyone, while unmarried women covered their mouths.
In Samoa, the first wedding night had to pass in the circle of sleeping relatives of the bride. Only newlyweds should make love silently so that no one wakes up. Otherwise, a serious scolding from relatives awaited the man. That is why many Samoan men lubricate their bodies with oil before their wedding night: it is easier to break free and the beatings are not so painful.
Sex on the wedding night in North Africa involved intercourse between the bride and guests at the wedding. Each guest had to give the bride a special gift.
There were tribes in which it was customary to deprive girls of virginity at a very young age - before the onset of menstruation. It had to be done by a complete stranger. Most often it turned out to be a traveler passing through the village. If at the time of the onset of menstruation a girl remained a virgin, this was considered a real shame, she could never get married.
In the Bakhtu tribe, which is located in Central Africa, instead of having sex on their wedding night, the newlyweds had to fight until dawn, and then disperse to their parents' houses and sleep off. A strange custom, of course, but every nation has its own cockroaches in the head. The next night, the newlyweds fought again. And so it continued until they pour out all the hatred on each other for years to come. Sometimes these fights ended in death.
Some African peoples had a tradition to carry out the act of defloration with the help of special tools. Such a mini-operation was carried out by the oldest women.
Sometimes this procedure was replaced with a natural one, but it was not the husband who had to deflower the girl, but the father or elder brother of the groom, as well as the priest or elder.
In the Arunto tribe, the friends of the future husband had to deprive the girl of her virginity. The man chose two or three friends, they kidnapped the bride and each of them had sex with her. When a girl loses her innocence, anyone could come to her house in the flesh until the wedding itself and have sex with her in order to take a sample from a newly-made woman.
HOW THE FIRST WEDDING NIGHT HAPPENS TO THE MUSLIM
The first wedding night for Muslims has not changed much since ancient times. Most Muslims still have the custom to show the groom's relatives the sheet on which the newlyweds had sex. Blood stains testified to the innocence of the bride, if they were not there, the girl was considered vicious, it was a shame for the whole family. Currently, this rule is observed only in some regions.
Before the wedding night, Muslims must observe a number of customs:
- The first wedding night for Muslims takes place only after the bride transports all the necessary things to her husband's house. Dowry for a girl begins to be collected from an early age, she must have at least 40 blankets and pillows. Bedding must be decorated and hand-sewn (some items may not be purchased)
- Before proceeding with intimacy, a man should put his hand on his wife’s head, praise her, say a few kind words and end the speech with the phrase “In the Name of Allah.” Then, the newlyweds read two ritual prayers, after which the man reads another prayer, in which he asks to bless Allah for a life together and, in case of divorce, help them maintain friendly relations.
- A man must give his wife a lot of sweets and delicious drinks. Honey and milk were considered obligatory products on the table. The husband should be soft and gentle when communicating with his wife, win her over, talk. Indecent sexual relations are prohibited by the Quran. A woman should not push a man away, because this could lead to sad consequences. Also, the newly-made wife should not be indifferent and cold.
- In the morning, after the wedding night, the spouses perform a ritual of washing and start eating. Often they set the table and invite relatives.
HOW THE FIRST WEDDING NIGHT IS GOING ON FOR THE CHECHEN
For Chechens, the first wedding night takes place on the third day of the wedding. To perform the ritual, the man put on a special suit, which was previously presented to him by the bride's relatives. At this time, the woman should be ready in the bedroom, where her married friends bring her.
Before intimacy, a man should open the Koran and pray to Allah, then close the book with a thick cloth and proceed to deprive his wife of innocence. If the spouses did not know each other before the wedding, sexual intercourse is not a prerequisite on the wedding night, they must first get to know each other.
There should be no one in the room where the newlyweds sleep, not even animals.
THE FIRST WEDDING NIGHT OF THE MUSLIMS IN DAGESTAN
For Dagestanis, the first wedding night is held in a special way: it is turned into a rite of martial arts. A man will be worthy of a woman only if he wins. The bride is being prepared for a duel since childhood, and on the wedding night they shaved their heads, lubricated exposed skin with grease, put on clothes with many knots, pulled overalls with a cord that should preserve virginity.
Nobody was allowed to enter the room where the battle took place, it was only possible to eavesdrop and peep. According to ancient customs, the guy was obliged to defeat the girl, and the fight continued until the victory.
If the fight went on for too long, the bride was persuaded to surrender, they specifically did not let her drink and eat, but they did everything for the groom.
The faster a man unties all the knots in his overalls, the faster he can take possession of his wife. The battle took place without weapons, and it was not forbidden to inflict bodily harm.
HOW THE FIRST WEDDING NIGHT GOES WITH GYPSIES
Gypsies, of course, are not the purest nation, but they have been observing their traditions from time immemorial. The first wedding night among the gypsies is called the "Takeaway of honor" and is considered the most important ceremony at the wedding. The bride must keep her virginity before marriage, otherwise, she will dishonor her family. The newlyweds, along with three respected ladies from both families, go to a separate room where they check the bride's innocence.
The sex of the newlyweds takes place without witnesses, but the groom is obliged to take out the veil with traces of virgin blood.
According to another version, three ladies deprive the girl of innocence, with the help of a sheet wound around her finger, so that the newlyweds could not falsify the virginity of the bride. There is another version of the first wedding night among the gypsies - the bride and groom must have the first sexual intercourse on the banquet table in the presence of guests. When the girl's innocence is proved, the ladies put a sheet with traces on a tray, shower it with red ribbons and take it out to the guests. Red ribbons are distributed to the groom's relatives for a fee. After the ceremony, the bride is dressed in a red dress, her braids are braided and the veil is removed.
FIRST WEDDING NIGHT IN RUSSIA
In the times of Ancient Russia, premarital relations were not forbidden - it was a widespread phenomenon. Some young people managed to live with each other and get married, and sometimes they had children. In some settlements, a "trial marriage" was common, in our civil. Young people lived together, shared life, gave birth to their first child, and only then they could get married, if they didn’t change their minds.
Some traditions of Russia were similar to barbarian ones. At the wedding, every man could touch and grope the bride the way it should have happened during the wedding night. The bride could even be stripped down to her undershirt at the wedding to show off all the juice. When the wedding was coming to an end, the young people retired to a separate room, and the guests eavesdropped and peeped under the door so that the newlyweds were busy with each other, and not with sleep.
Sex was supposed to last until the morning, which was facilitated by the guests - they yelled ditties with sexual overtones and spurred the young in every possible way. In the morning, the bride and groom provided evidence of the deprivation of innocence. If the groom did not succeed, he could repeat the attempt two more times, if even then he did not cope with his duty, the groom was replaced by a more experienced man. In some villages, it was customary to spend the wedding night with the groom's older brothers, who came to the aid of the inexperienced groom in case of emergency.
As we can see, the wedding night in many countries involved the deprivation of a girl's virginity, if the girl was vicious before the wedding, her family was disgraced, and the negligent bride could be returned to her parents. True, now any gynecologist will say that during the first sexual intercourse there may not be blood, just like pain, since the hymen is different for everyone.
The first wedding night in Russia was arranged in a special way and had a lot of differences from the similar tradition of other nations. Among the peoples of Africa, Europe and India, the right of the first night meant the intimate contact of the bride with an outside man. Often it was the elder of the tribe, a noble gentleman, or even just the first person he met.
In Russia, the right to deprive a girl of her virginity traditionally belonged to her future husband. According to church canons, a married marriage is sacred and any attempt on someone else's marriage bed is a great sin. Later, the feudal lords often neglected this law and enjoyed the right of the wedding night, but the church did not welcome this.
Time spending
The wedding ceremony in Russia was a complex sacrament that combined Christian and pagan traditions. The timing of the wedding has always been carefully chosen. For many peoples of the world, the first intercourse of newlyweds could occur on the third or fourth day, or even later (some Muslim countries, India, etc.).
For Russians, the first wedding night took place during the wedding celebration, so it was very important to schedule the wedding on the date allowed by the church. According to Orthodox laws, one cannot have sexual relations during fasting and on church holidays, therefore weddings were not scheduled for this time.
wedding night ritual
For the Russian people, the wedding night was called the basement for a long time. This is due to the fact that the bed of the young was always arranged in a cool place: in the basement of the hut (pictured), closet, barn or bathhouse.
This always happened on the territory of the groom, since the girl after the wedding went to live with him. For the newlyweds, a high bed was prepared on a strong wooden base. He was covered with bedding from the girl's dowry. The preparation of the bed for the bride and groom was done by female bed-makers from among the matchmakers. Also, the mother or sister of the groom could prepare the bed.
Many ritual objects were laid on the bed, which were supposed to protect the newlyweds from damage and provide them with a comfortable existence in the future. Such amulets included small rye sheaves, bags of flour, mattresses, and feather beds. From above the bed was covered with a snow-white embroidered bedspread. Several logs, a frying pan, a poker, and a juniper branch were placed under the bed of the bed. These items were supposed to protect the couple from all evil spirits. Logs symbolized future offspring, so they had to be put more.
Seeing off the newlyweds
A whole crowd of guests accompanied the newlyweds to the “bedchamber” prepared in this way: friends, matchmakers, relatives, and in general anyone who wanted to take part in a noisy and cheerful action. The farewell was accompanied by songs, obscene jokes and advice. Druzhka beat with a whip on the box, driving out evil spirits. Then he had to pay a ransom to the bed-maids.
Alone
After all these rituals, the newlyweds were finally left alone. The door was locked, and a cage guard was left near it. He also had to protect the newlyweds from evil spells and various evil spirits. But the guests often remained at the door and simply spying on the young.
Left alone, the bride and groom first treated themselves to bread and chicken. This food was supposed to give the couple fertility. After eating, the girl was obliged to remove the boots from the guy's feet. Thus, she demonstrated humility in front of her future husband and showed her readiness to obey him in everything. Also, the girl had to ask her husband for permission to lie with him. Then there must have been sexual intercourse. A friend came to inquire about this several times. As soon as the girl lost her virginity, the marriage was considered physically confirmed, which was loudly announced to all guests. The young could again be taken to the feast and delighted with songs of the most obscene content, or the guests themselves came to the cellar to the newlyweds and remained there with them until dawn.
Innocence as the main attribute
The most important moment in this whole ritual was the demonstration of the bride's shirt with blood stains. If the bride kept her virginity before marriage, she was considered honest. Otherwise, she brought shame not only on herself, but also on her parents. A collar was hung around the neck of the matchmaker and the parents of the dishonest newlywed. Father was brought a glass of wine with a hole in the bottom. The girl could even be returned to her father's house.
The loss of virginity on the wedding night was symbolically celebrated by hanging towels embroidered with red thread and breaking pots. After that, the girl became "young", and the guy - "young". After the wedding night, the young woman was dressed in the clothes of a married woman and put on her appropriate headdress. The whole ritual had to be strictly observed, otherwise the new family was threatened with infertility and poverty.
